Wednesday, September 10, 2014

3 Tips a Strong Woman Could Use


Knowing when and how to act per time is the hallmark of wisdom.  

A strong woman is always a beautiful specimen to watch. Many are intrigued by her, want to be like her and would love to have her; others envy her, while some are intimidated by her. People with low self-esteem are intimidated by her presence and achievements; abusers and manipulators hate her because she won’t tolerate the “nonsense” they dish out without showing them the way to the door. Strong men with a balanced self-esteem trip for her and would give anything to have her cuz they see her as an asset. On her part, she doesn’t care too much about what people think about her because she’s too busy living her life, chasing her dreams, fulfilling destiny and touching her world.  She’s a woman of substance; focused and diligent in all her pursuits, productive, responsible, satisfied with who she is and proud of all God made her to be, independent, an achiever, confident and mature. She can handle her business and pay her own bills. She’s all this and more… In reality, there’s a snag somewhere. In the process of being strong, sometimes strong women lose their femininity where and when it is needed the most.
Hey Strong Woman! I know you’ve got it all together but here are 3 tips (secrets actually) that will make your relationship better and make the man in your life enjoy your strength even more, instead of being wounded by it.
Tip #1- Learn to Let Him Take the Lead
In the context of courtship and marriage, this is veerrry important. Because a strong woman has been used to years of doing things herself and her way, she finds it difficult to adapt and get used to letting the man in her life take the lead and call the shots. Hello Strong Woman! You may be used to calling the shots in your life and at work right now, but once you get into either courtship or marriage, you must learn to let the man in your life take the lead. This doesn’t mean you become a doormat or “kurma” (a mute), it just means that you give suggestions and say what you think, and allow him make the final decision. It also includes knowing that you gotta discuss important decisions that affect your relationship with him before you make them, not after. And just in case he didn’t exactly buy your idea, have enough maturity to know that things don’t have to always go your way. One word for this is submission Relationships require compromise and submission to last and if you can’t handle it, then save the brothers some trouble and don’t get into one.
Tip #2-Allow Him to Help You, Even When You Can Do It Yourself

 Yea, I know you can do most things yourself and even buy most things yourself, but sometimes, you should allow the man in your life feel like he’s useful and take pleasure in doing something for you. Most men like to do something for you simply because you asked them to. Your request creates in your man a psychological feeling of importance, usefulness, and your belief in his ability to get it done as he bends over to grant your request. Doing everything yourself all the time “spoils him” and makes him think “she doesn’t need me”/”I’m not useful to her”. It eventually leads to the point where he may no longer try to get you stuff or do things for you and by that time, you’ll be the one complaining that he never helps out around the house. I know this doesn’t come naturally to you, but it’s something you consciously need to learn and practice.
Tip #3-Switch to Girl Mode When You’re with Him


Women multitask a lot and have to play different roles. These roles involve us wearing different costumes, so to speak, and acting out different parts as occasion demands. Such roles include: mama mode, boss mode, work mode etc. We switch across these different modes unconsciously. However, the problem is that when you eventually get time with the man in your life, instead of switching to girl/wife mode, you remain stuck in mama, boss or work mode. This causes a lot of problems because no man wants to be in a relationship with his mama, or his boss and no one wants to leave the office to return to the same rigid, emotionless and “stiff” environment (work mode) at home. Leave all other modes where they belong. Make a conscious effort to switch to girlfriend/wife mode when you’re with him so he feels like the man in your life and not your kid, subordinate or coworker.
One More Word
If you’re a strong woman reading this, endeavour to practice it and your relationship/marriage will be better for it. If you know or have a strong woman in your life as a spouse, friend, sister, in-law, colleague or whatever, share this with her; you’ll be doing her a lot of good. Roses naturally have thorns; but in order to enjoy them, their thorns are clipped before they’re sold. Putting these tips into practice will clip out the thorny aspect in your life and make you a rose to be enjoyed in every dimension. Xoxo
Did you enjoy this post? Do you agree with these tips? Can you think of other tips a strong woman could use? Feel free to leave your views in the comment section
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Are you at a crossroad? Do you need advice or counsel on lady issues, relationship matters and life in general?  E-mail me on graceyokoye@yahoo.com and I’ll be glad to help.
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