10 Stupid Things You Shouldn’t Do When You’re Young (Pt 2)

This is a sequel to yesterdays post and today, I’m sharing the remaining 5 stupid things you shouldn’t do when you’re wrong.  Read the previous 5 things here.

#6 – Enter into a Blood Covenant

No matter how in love you are right now, NEVER enter into a blood covenant or any kind of covenant for that matter. If love is not enough to keep you both, a covenant is not enough either. Moreover, making such a covenant just gives the devil a platform to manipulate circumstances to ensure you both break the covenant and suffer the consequences. The only covenant you should enter into for love should be a marriage.

#7 – Enter into a Shrine for any Reason

Image source: bomapeters.blogspot.com

Oya, hold your ears: NEVER ENTER A JUJU SHRINE FOR ANY REASON. Period!!! Whether you’re just accompanying a friend, someone accused you of something and wants you to swear an oath there, you want to “inquire” on something or get something to make your business or relationship work better, NEVER go to a shrine. That singular action of stepping you into a shrine opens you up to evil spirits and assorted evil manipulations to start working in your life. If you think I’m wrong, ask your pastor. You have your whole life ahead of you to jeopardize it this way.

#8 – Hook up with Strangers in Secret Places

Yea, I know you can take care of yourself, after all you’re no longer a baby. If you have to meet up with strangers or acquaintances in strange places, make sure to tell at least one person close to you where you’re going to and who you’re going with, just in case anything happens. Even if it’s your “boyfriend” or “bossom friend” you’re going to a strange place with, always make sure at least one person knows. Friends and boyfriends have led people to their untimely death, you know. A word is enough for the wise.

#9 – Get Involved with Married Men

Okay, Okay; say whatever you feel like about dating married men. But the truth is: when you date married men, it creates an aura around you that eventually hurts you in future, despite all you think you may gain. That aura becomes like a spiritual perfume or sign board that attracts only married men looking for a booty call to you and blinds single guys to you which will leave you in frustration by the time you’re ready to settle down. To understand this more, read Juanita Bynum’s book No More Sheets.

#10 – Prove Your Love via Sex

Image source: www.brimtime.com

 As long as the earth remains, this cliché will be used “If you love me, prove your love for me”. And then all the pressures to prove your love via sex begins. Don’t be deceived; that has always been a punch line to get ladies to have pre-marital sex. Sex has never been a proof of love. Despite how much he threatens to leave you or get it from some other girl, even if you give in have sex with him, he will still leave you and get another girl when he’s through with you. Wise up; it’s the testosterone speaking, not love. 

Voila! Those are the stupid things you shouldn’t do when you’re young because like a boomerang, they will come back to bite you in nasty places in your future. The choice is now yours to make. If you still choose to be entangled in them, get ready to stomach the consequences in future. May God give us all the grace to make the right choices at each point in life. Xoxo. Have a smashing weekend.

Questions? Suggestions? Private comments? Facing a relationship dilemma and in need of counsel? I’m just an email away; email me on graceyokoye@yahoo.com

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10 Stupid Things You Shouldn’t Do When You’re Young (Pt 1)

There always this feeling that accompanies that stage of life when you’re young and care free: you want to try out almost everything that’s in vogue for the fun of it. There’s usually little or no thought or worries about the future and how our present actions can affect it; after all, the future will take care of itself shey? Today’s post is dedicated to those who are “young by age’ or “young at heart” who still live life like there’s no tomorrow experimenting with every new fad around and making thoughtless decisions. As you “enjoy” your life, here are 10 stupid things you should’t try. Why? They’ll come back to bite you in the butt tomorrow. Leggo!

#1 – Take a Nude/Incriminating Picture

 With the advent of camera phones and the fun of taking selfies for the fun of it, the easiest thing to do is to strike a pose and go click click. So, you take a nude picture and save it on your phone (or your beaus phone) with a phone lock, or you even post it to some internet site. Fast forward to ten, fifteen years later; you’re now somebody of value and your nude pics comes out to hunt you…you pay huge sums of money to your blackmailers over and over again or you face the scandal…Such a stupid move to make now!

#2 – Do a Sex Tape

I know you’re so in love with whoever you’re with now and so the temptation of doing a sex tape since you will eventually get married and it’s your personal phone looks like a good option. What happens when one thing leads to another and your sex tape goes viral? Shame and embarrassment without measure is what you’ll get.

#3 – Sex Chat

These days, all these social media apps have turned people to elenu chatty chatty (chat freaks). In addition, they’ve also included sex chat to the whole mix due to the nasty requests made by for nude pics. Don’t do it baby, even if he’s your boyfriend. That is what those other ladies thought and their nude pics started flying all over the internet. 

#4 – Get a Tattoo or Awkward Piercings

 Yes it’s your body and you have a right to do as you please plus you’re young and carefree and these two things are in vogue now. But the truth is, a few years from now, you’ll be fed up with those tattoos and piercings but it would be too late to take them off. Not to talk about the countless doors of opportunities it will most likely shut for you. Despite what you think, in official circles (which you would be involved in future) showing up with a tattoo or piercing automatically screams “irresponsible” and makes you lose juicy business opportunities etc.

#5 – Sign Contracts without Seeking Counsel

Whether is a recording contract, modeling contract, partnership contract or whatever, when you’re young, make sure you seek counsel from knowledgeable adults and let them accompany you to the signing of the contract. This will keep you from being cheated and mortgaged into quasi-slavery via those terms and conditions written in very tiny letters. No matter how they pressure you to sign the contract, as long as it’s not at gun point, always insist on talking to your “lawyer” (it mustn’t be a real lawyer but someone who is knowledgeable that can give wise counsel) first.

P:S Phew! That’s enough for one day. Catch the remaining 10 stupid things you shouldn’t do when you’re young tomorrow. Xoxo

Questions? Suggestions? Private comments? Facing a relationship dilemma and in need of counsel? I’m just an email away; email me on graceyokoye@yahoo.com

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6 SIGNS HE'S NOT THAT INTO YOU

Hey there, I bet the month of February has been treating you real good. No matter how it has been so far, I would like you to know that your better days lie ahead, not behind. Hold on to your faith and keep pushing on.



A lot of ladies get caught up in a web of confusion with guys who they think have got a thing for them only to have their bubbles busted later on when the guy goes on to date or even marry another lady eventually. If you've ever been in this situation, I sympathise with you. If you haven't, then this post will keep you from such entanglements. Bottom line is - This post is helpful to us all. So, without much ado, here are 5 signs that guy is not into you as much as you think he is.

#1 - YOU DO MOST OF THE CALLING



Yes beau, if you seem to be calling, bbming, whatsapping, or texting more than he does, it's not because he's so busy as he claims; it's simply because you're not a priority for him as he is to you. Believe me, there are other people in his life he calls 24/7 despite his busy schedule and the reason why he calls you once in a blue moon is because you're probably not on his priority list. Wake up my dear! When a man is into you, his calls and messages will prove it; he'll do everything to stay in touch with you. No matter how busy he is in the day, he'll bridge the gap by reaching out to you at night/weekends.

#2 - HE CALLS YOU HIS SISTER AND TREATS YOU LIKE ONE
Aunty mi, if for the past few months or years, he still calls you his sister and keeps treating you like one, it's because that's the box he has put you into in his life. Yes he may start out calling you sister, but if he's into you, your identity in his life should have changed by now to "girlfriend / fiancée". No one marries their sister, at least not in this generation.

#3 - HE'S NEVER OFFICIALLY ASKED YOU OUT
Some guys are in the habit of leading girls on by doing and saying nice things without defining their motives. Don't assume things; the fact that he's acting all nice to you and you have feelings for him doesn't mean the feelings are mutual. Save yourself the heart break dear. Before he wastes your time any further, sit him down and ask him to clarify if he has interest in you and whatever he says will determine your next line of action.

#4- HE SEEKS YOUR ADVICE ON HOW TO GET, HANDLE OR UNDERSTAND LADIES



If this is your case, congratulations! You have just been friend zoned and you're now his special adviser on women matters. This should make you happy if you're getting paid for your services but considering the fact that you would love to have him for yourself, it is just another sign that he's not that into you for the time being (at least not to the extent of having a relationship with you).

#5 - HE'S ALWAYS TRYING TO HOOK YOU UP
Yes oooo, if he's always introducing you to friends in order to hook you up with them, it's obvious you don't mean much to him. What a man wants so much, he keeps for himself.

#6 - YOU'RE HIS REBOUND CHICK, BOREDOM KICKER
If he only calls you to hang out with him when he's bored / during weekends, and has never tried to introduce you to his family members or parents, he's not that into you. He sees you as a boredom kicker or relaxation mate - daz all. If the only time he shows up frequently in your life is when his girlfriend just left him, congratulations. You're on your way to becoming his rebound chick. All that is needed is throwing in some bedmatics and bam! You're officially his rebound chick.

SO WHAT DO I DO???
The phrase "he's not that into you" shows that he likes you on some level but doesn't like you enough to date you or have a serious romantic relationship with you. Hanging around him for TOO LONG hoping he'll change his mind will only end in a broken heart and many tears. Find a suitable day and time and ask him what you mean to him and what his intentions are towards you. If he's been shy and scared all this while, he'll pick up the bait and tell you how he truly feels. If he's put you in the friend or sister zone, he'll tell you plainly so you can find another guy who shares your feelings. Any which way, he'll tell you his CHURCH MIND and save you precious time. 2015 is not the year to waste time pining after a guy who's not that into you hoping he'll change his mind while other guys are interested in you. And if you insist on fasting and praying so he starts liking you, please do. But remember that prayer is not witchcraft used in manipulating someone to love you. If he eventually starts loving you, it'll be because it's in line with God's will for you. Sometimes, stepping out of the friend zone and out of his life eventually makes him realise how much you mean to him. Whatever you do, don't wait there idly hoping he comes around while years are passing - you'll just be putting yourself on a long thing.

Guys, abi I lie? Can I get a witness?

P:S - Tomorrow, I'll be doing a blogpost titled "10 STUPID THINGS YOU SHOULDN'T DO WHEN YOU'RE YOUNG". You don't wanna miss it for anything. Xoxo

For feedback, comments and enquiries, email me on graceyokoye@yahoo.com

TWISTS AND TURNS - Episode 7

Episode 7

Tamuno stared at the picture one more time. She had earlier watched Iye leave to see her daughter; though she had made a mistake, at least she had a smart child who was a constant source of joy. “She’s always full of smiles when she looks at her baby's picture but this picture in my hand brings me no joy”, Tamuno thought to herself. It was three years already but it still hurt like it was yesterday. She sniffed again and blew her nose into an handkerchief. She ran her hand through the picture that was getting old and the colour was fading. She felt like she was forgetting his face; she felt guilty about that and closed her eyes trying to imagine his smile but it was like a fading mist now. "Oh Joe, why did you leave me huh! Why!" She cried out in desperation as hot tears ran down her cheeks.
Bukky ran to Tamuno's side and held her in her arms. "Tamuno, who is Joe?" Bukky asked perplexed. Bukky had never seen her so distraught. Tamuno has always been the non-chalant and carefree one among them. She was in and out of relationships and was always quick to dismiss further talk about it. Bukky leaned forward and tried to pick the picture but Tamuno snatched it away from her reach.
"Babes, what is wrong with you? This is not you at all. You are even crying. The Tamuno I know never cries, especially not about a man." Bukky said.
" Bukky you won't understand, he loved me dearly but you know me now, I was too stubborn and…and..." She sobbed even harder and louder.
" And what?"
" He died!" She said and broke down into loud wailing.
"What!"
***********************************
Iye looked away trying to imagine where her daughter could be while Mark awaited an answer.
" Mark I… I really don't know. David took her somewhere and I feel my baby is not fine." She turned to face him trying to keep her emotions in check. "She is not very healthy Mark. She has asthma and his neighbour was saying some woman came to take her away. Mark I am getting crazy, I can't begin to imagine what she is going through now, what if the woman is not nice and..." She choked on her words as hot tears ran down her cheeks. Mark pulled her close and hugged her tenderly. He could not stand to see her crying; he could feel her pain and wondered why David had been that mean to her.
"I’m really sorry about this. I know there will be a way out, okay." He said wiping her tears. She eased herself from his embrace, sniffed and looked him in the eye like one searching for hope.
" But Mark, what if it is too late?"

To be continued…

The story continues next week Tuesday. Keep a date here and invite your friends and loved ones too. 

Don't understand what the story is about? Read older episodes below.

Episode 1 2 3 4 5 6

Pheobe Omiwole is a motivational speaker and a talented writer who uses her pen and voice to affect the world and the lives of men. She also has a personal blog where she writes really inspiring stuff. Check out her blog on  http://www.pheobeomiwole.WordPress.com