Handling Rejection

This post doesn’t only apply to relationships; it also applies to facing rejection in every sphere of life. Rejection is something which if not properly handled, may lead to momentary depression, loss of confidence and zeal to move on. Rejection feels like the sting of a bee. Whether you’re male or female, the feeling of rejection hurts just the same way. Keeping these things in mind will make you handle rejection better so that it doesn’t steal your zeal for life or leave you depressed:

Don’t take it personal: For whatever reason you have been rejected, it has nothing to do with you. Nothing is wrong with you. It’s about the preference of the other party involved. It’s not that you’re not good enough; it’s just that you’re not what they were looking for. For instance, I prefer Coke to Fanta so if you serve me Fanta, I will reject it. It doesn’t mean Fanta is not good enough; it just means I prefer Coke. Same thing applies to you.

It's a free world: Yes, it is a free world and they have the right to choose and have their own preferences. One man’s meat is another man’s poison, they say. If they don’t like or want you, some other person thinks you’re amazing and suitable the way you are. Just wait till you find them.

It's not about what you did or didn’t do: A relationship that wasn’t meant to last will crash, no matter what you do or don’t do. So when it ends, take comfort in the fact that you gave it your best shot and stop beating yourself up about what you did or didn’t do.

Don’t grow cold: Hey! Hey! Hey! Don’t withdraw into your shell because of what happened; you’ll just end up missing out on the better things God has in store for you. Stay sweet and cheerful; don’t get bitter.

Open your heart again: How else will you experience better days if you don’t open your heart? Open your heart to love. Open your heart to the same place where you experienced rejection. Give it another try cuz your next try may just make you smile. 

You’re valuable, useful, desirable, a solution and a blessing. Just like a picture is useless to a blind man, there are some people who won’t find you useful because they are blind to your value. Just reposition yourself and the right people will perceive your worth and receive you.

P:S Do you have any private issues you want to raise or discuss on life, relationships, work etc.? Would you like to advertise with us? I'm just an email away! Email me on graceyokoye@yahoo.com

 

Evidence Grace is the founder and head-blogger at Sister 2 Sister Nigeria. She's passionate about seeing people get it right in life, destiny and marriage. A woman of many gifts, and talents, she is focused on fulfilling God's purpose for her life, becoming ALL God has fore-ordained her to be and spreading the gospel to the ends of the earth. Her marital status? Keep your fingers crossed.

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4 Things You Shouldn’t Be Looking at and Why

You can’t to look anywhere but forward if you must win the race of life. Selah.

Happy weekend to you. I do hope the weekend is treating you real good. A thought entered my head recently that blew my mind and made me scream out and this was what I thought about: the difference between the angle of elevation and the angle of depression is not what is happening around you but what direction you choose to look at. There are things that elevate your spirit when you look at them and there are things that depress you when you look at them. What does this mean? What you look at with your physical eyes, but most especially with your mind’s eye is very important. Today, I’ll like to focus on what you look at with your mind’s eye. So, here are four things you should not be looking at with your mind’s eye and why.

#1- The Past

The past represents everything good, bad and ugly that happened to you or people around you all through time before now. Yesterday is not and will never be today. When all you look at in your mind’s eyes is the unpleasant past it kills your hope for a brighter day, spoils the joy you would have experienced today, and makes you reactive, instead of proactive. Even if the past was very beautiful and blissful, looking at it constantly and wishing you could go back to yesterday is not a proactive thought. As much as we try, we can’t rewind or bring back yesteryears. Looking at how great we looked formally or the wonderful achievements of the past is supposed to be applied to people who are dead and gone while making a tribute to them. You have a future ahead of you and your present life to deal with; look forward.

#2 – Your Mistakes

 No one deliberately sets out to make mistakes. And even though we sometimes wish we never made the mistakes we made, mistakes are a useful part of the school called life. If you ever have to look at your mistakes, glance at it briefly (glance, not look) to take corrections from it and dump it where it should be-buried with the past. You know why? Focusing on the mistakes you made kills your boldness and will to try again. Take a cue from babies learning to walk: even though they fell yesterday, it doesn’t stop them from trying to walk or run again today.

#3- The Chaos Around You

These days we hear a lot of terrible and incredible stories of what people do and what happens to people around us and you will agree with me that these stories sometimes leaves us with goose bumps. In fact, turn up any news channel and the ratio of bad news to good news is quite high. Even with regards to marriage, the gory tales of happenings in marriages as well as the alarming divorce rate is quite depressing. Now I’m not saying turn a deaf ear or stop watching the news but such things are not things you should internalize and stare at continually in your mind. They will only depress you and drain the batteries of your zest for life plus turn you into a cynic, a pessimist and a faithless person.

#4 – The Mountains Before You

By “mountains” I mean challenges; those “what ifs” and difficulties that confront you on the way to achieving your dreams, visions and aspirations. If you’re a goal getter and a vision-chaser like me, then you understand what I mean when I say mountains. Take note of them yes, but not as obstacles or problems; take note of them as challenges that you will surely overcome. The mountains before you are not supposed to form the focus in your mind’s eye; finding the solution to them is supposed to form your focus.

Why Shouldn’t I Look at these Four Things???

It’s simple: these four things are all angles of depression that if you continually stare at them will land you into depression puncture your faith and prevent you from winning in life. Before the aeroplane was made, men never believed it was possible. Before Mount Everest was first climbed by Edmund Hillary from New Zealand and Tenzing Norgay from Nepal, people believed it was impossible.  No one wins a race by running and looking backwards or looking down below; they win it by looking forward, keeping their eyes on the finish line and running. Another direction you need to look at is “upwards”. It is the angle of elevation that will eventually elevate you. Psalm 121:1-2 says “I lift up my eyes to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord who made heaven and earth.” 

Miracles still happen, we all need help. What you look at in your mind’s eye affects you and your life seriously. Do a soul-check today and reposition your mind’s eyes. Xoxo. Have a sweet week ahead.

P:S Are you at a crossroad? Do you need advice or counsel on lady issues, relationship matters and life in general?  E-mail me on graceyokoye@yahoo.com and I’ll be glad to help.

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