Showing posts with label right man. Show all posts
Showing posts with label right man. Show all posts

Tuesday, December 15, 2015

5 Signs He’s Not the Man for You


Hello Sis,
How’s the cold weather treating you? Hope it’s not causing you any trouble. I’m enjoying the weather cuz this is my favourite season of the year. You know why? It does my complexion much good *wink*. Today’s post is dedicated to all those ladies who are already in a relationship and don’t know for sure if you’re with the right man. Not to worry. Here are 5 signs that will help you know if the man you’re with is good for you or not.

#1 -   He can’t handle your weaknesses
Every human on the earth has weaknesses. The right man for you is specially graced by God and experiences to handle, tolerate and love you with your weaknesses. He will be kind to you and patient with you in the areas of your weaknesses as he encourages you to get better. Your weaknesses are not a deal breaker for him. He knows them well and accepts you the way you are. He even adapts to you by becoming a help in the area of your weakness. For instance, if he knows your weakness is late coming, he devices ways to ensure you come early by waking up hours ahead and when you occasionally slip, he won’t kill you for it.

 #2 -   He can’t handle your dreams

If you’re an ambitious woman or a woman with dreams, the right man for you is one who celebrates and supports your dreams. He is not threatened or intimidated by what you have achieved or will achieve. He constantly finds ways to support the advancement of your dreams. The wrong man for you is anyone who has a preset view on what a woman should do and is trying to remake you into his dream woman. For example, some men believe a woman shouldn’t work; others believe she should leave whatever she is doing and manage one of his business outlets, become a nurse or anything that he chooses. They have no respect or regard for your dreams/purpose. If you value your dreams, you shouldn’t be with such a man because he will just end up choking you to death.

#3 – He can’t handle your temperament
Everyone has a temperament; some other people call it personality. The wrong man always complains about the things in your temperament that makes you who you are. God made us all who we are. Our background and experiences also contributes to who we are. When I say temperament here, I mean those aspects of you that are natural or core to you. For instance, if you’re a naturally reserved person, the wrong man for you is one who complains that you’re too quiet. If he wants a boisterous person, he should simply go for one! If you’re a lively person, the wrong man is one who complains that you’re too lively. The right man loves you the way you are; whether you’re lively or reserved. He may complain if you take it out of proportion, but he basically accepts you as you are.

#4 – Fans you into foolishness
The wrong man for you is any man who encourages you to do stupid and foolish things that are against your personal principles and bring out the worst in you. If he always unconsciously or consciously brings out the worst in you, he is not good for you. Check your life since you met him; has he brought out the best, the worst or the foolishness in you? The answer will tell you if he is the man for you or not.


#5 – Does not contribute to your improvement
Iron sharpens iron; the right man’s presence in your life over time will make you a better, more refined, more fruitful woman. A man of worth will add to you tremendously with time and I’m not referring to money. If all he is contributed to your life so far is getting you addicted to booze, clubbing, sex, twerking etc., sister, he’s not good for you.



Please note that every man is good, but not every man is good for you as a person. You may like him a lot and he may love you to pieces but you may both be unsuitable for each other. Water and fire are good individually. However, both do not mix because one quenches the other. The wrong man may not be bad or nasty as a person but when the two of you come together, the combination is unsuitable or sometimes lethal. When you let go of the wrong man, you open the door for God to lead you to the right one.

P:S – Over to you dear reader. Can you think of any other signs? Add them in the comments section. 



Do you have any private issues you want to raise or discuss on life, relationships, work etc.? Would you like to advertise with us? I'm just an email away! Email me on graceyokoye@yahoo.com
 
Evidence Grace is the founder and head-blogger at Sister 2 Sister Nigeria. She's passionate about seeing people get it right in life, destiny and marriage. A woman of many gifts, and talents, she is focused on fulfilling God's purpose for her life, becoming ALL God has fore-ordained her to be and spreading the gospel to the ends of the earth. Her marital status? Keep your fingers crossed.

Follow us on twitter here and like our facebook page here.

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Check out both sites to listen to the show for yourself. You can also download our online radio show file when you listen on hulkshare.com

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Thursday, July 2, 2015

Common Misconceptions about Husbands




Hello dear,
The misconceptions I’m about to share with you today are dangerous mindsets that have come to be accepted in some quarters. If you do not delete them from your mind and renew your mind, they will destroy your marriage when you get married eventually.  If you’re already married, you need to use this post as an x-ray to see if these little foxes are part of your mindset so that you can destroy them before they destroy your beautiful marriage. But before I move on, I need you to read this with an open heart so it can fulfill its purpose in your life. As you read, may the scales of tradition, culture and old wives’ fables concerning husbands and marriage be removed from your heart and mind in Jesus name.

#1 – He is an ATM
Yes, it is the husband’s major role to provide for his family but that does not make him an ATM or a money tree you can pluck from at will. Your husband is not ATM that is available to dispense money to you at your beck and call. Even if he were, just like an ATM runs out of cash sometimes and cannot dispense cash, he may sometimes be unable to give you the things you want and desire. Your husband is HUMAN, he is not Jehovah Jireh who makes a way where there seems to be none. He can only perform according to what he has or is able to get per time. Check it out now – even your biological parents were not ATMs; there were times when they couldn’t give you what you wanted for one reason or the other. Instead of going looking to your husband as the sole provider of all your needs, look unto God as your provider and see your husband as one of God’s major channels to supply your needs. When you have this as a perspective, if your husband can’t meet your needs, God will find a way to meet your needs and you will be able to maintain a good attitude while you wait for God’s provision. It will also prevent you from becoming a nag (the thing all men hate) and move you to pray for God’s provision for your husband instead.

#2 – He is a superman
This mindset entails expecting that your husband can’t be affected by the storms and temptations of life. What this does is that it puts you at ease and prevents you from backing you husband up with words of appreciation, affection, encouragement and prayer. It also makes you insensitive to his struggles and your role as his God-given helper. Even if he is a man of God, he is still a man who may struggle with some things sometimes and will need your help, whether he acts like it or not. Delete from your head completely the fact that you’re marrying or married to a superman. Even superman was not always dressed as superman – sometimes he appears as plain old Clark Kent who needs the love of his woman. You are human and will be married to another human. There is no perfect man.



#3 – He shouldn’t make mistakes
This is related to the previous one. I wish I could promise you that your husband would NEVER make mistakes. But baby girl, as spirit filled as he is, as smart and wise as he is, he will make mistakes sometimes, just as you will. Nobody deliberately plans to make mistakes; mistakes are what they are – MISTAKES. In your mind, you may have written a list of things he should do such as: if he loves me, he wouldn’t _________, he should know ________, he should never speak to me in an angry tone etc. Having unrealistic expectations is a recipe for disaster in marriage. If you have such in your head, delete them. They will do you no good. Not sure if the expectations you have are unrealistic? Email me with graceyokoye@yahoo.com and I’ll help you sift through them and show you which ones are unrealistic.

#4 – He is just like me
Hmmmm!!! This is a very deadly misconception. Your husband may have similar hobbies, interests or goals as you, he may even share your beliefs, but he is not like you. Research and experience has proved that men reason differently and see things from a different perspective, compared to women. They have different needs, priorities and expectations even in marriage. That is on a general level. When it comes to individuality, each man is unique and different. It’s just like comparing Japanese cars with a Mercedes Benz: you may not be able to use the spare parts of Japanese cars on a Mercedes Benz without causing damage. In other words, you can’t relate with your husband as you do with your girlfriends. You must not only understand the peculiar differences between men and women, you must also understand the peculiar differences that differentiate your man from other men. For more details, read the book “Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus; it will help you tremendously.  

Renew your mind


You can't afford to enter into marriage with misconceptions as your instructors or your cultural history as your coach. Renew your mind. Fill it with the truth from God's word and divinely inspired books on marriage so you can a have a correct view about marriage. It's not enough to find the right man. Prayerfully locate every misconception in your mind about marriage, husbands and your role as a wife, uproot them and replace them with the truth. Romans 12:2 says "do not be conformed to the ways of the world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind...". An unrenewed mind can destroy a heaven ordained relationship or marriage. A word, they say, is enough for the wise. xoxo 

Can you think of any other misconceptions about husbands? Guys in the house, we need your views ooo. 

P:S Do you have any questions or comments about this blogpost? Do you need counsel concerning relationships? Do you have any private issues you want to raise? Would you like to be featured as a guest blogger here? Would you like to advertise with us? Email me on graceyokoye@yahoo.com 

Evidence Grace is the founder and head-blogger at Sister 2 Sister Nigeria. She's passionate about seeing people get it right in life, destiny and marriage. A woman of many gifts, and talents, she is focused on fulfilling God's purpose for her life, becoming ALL God has fore-ordained her to be and spreading the gospel to the ends of the earth. Her marital status?Keep your fingers crossed.

Follow us on twitter here and like our facebook page here.


Have you heard???
The blog now has an online radio show on riecho.net. You can also listen to the show on www.hulkshare.com/sister2sisternigeria

Check out both sites to listen to the show for yourself. You can also download our online radio show file when you listen on hulkshare.com

Feel free to send in your comments on our online radio show by email on graceyokoye@yahoo.com
Or sister2sisternigeria@gmail.com




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