Tuesday, May 12, 2015

BECOMING THE WOMAN OF HIS DREAMS 2



MAN TO WOMAN
Today, on our column MAN TO WOMAN,  which is all about getting a man's perspective on different issues that have to do with women, Paul Aliyu finishes his post on becoming the dream woman. Read and share with someone around you. 

Today, Paul Aliyu continues with the second part of how to become the woman of his dreams.  If you missed the first part of the blogpost, click here to read. It's gonna be a long read but I promise you won't regret it. Happy reading!!! 

SO HOW DO I BECOME THE WOMAN OF HIS DREAMS?
1. Be a dream - driven person
You cannot be the woman of his dreams if you are not driven (passionate, obsessed, motivated) by dreams. To be driven by dreams means to be attracted to his dreams. It means you desire to be with him because you have found out that both of you can accomplish a purpose and achieve goals together. The bible says, “Can two walk together, except they be agreed.”

Agreement is the key word here. Your purpose/dreams must agree. Remember God made Eve for Adam at the point of his fulfilling his God given assignment. Adam met Eve at that point he was busy fulfilling what God commanded him to do. You cannot fit into his dreams (purpose) if you are not passionate about purpose yourself. It will become difficult for you to blend in if you are not dream driven.
“All men who have achieved great things have been great dreamers” – Orison Swett Marden

2. Prepare and be busy
Preparation is one aspect that can never be ignored if you want to fit into his dreams. Though you have not met him (in person) but prepare ahead of your meeting with him. In most cases, your meeting is designated in your place of preparation or fulfilling destiny. A man with purpose will get attracted to you in your place of fulfilling destiny. He will be attracted by your works, efforts and zeal in your place of fulfilling destiny.

Never ignore preparation because in that place of preparation, anything good can happen.
Purpose attracts purpose; idleness will always attract idleness
A man that has been born with purpose, burning with accomplishing and fulfilling purpose will never be attracted by idleness. It is your busyness fulfilling purpose that will attract him to you.

God brought Eve to Adam after creating her. Be busy fulfilling God’s will for your life and in doing that, He will bring you to your Adam. gold is not sought for in the desert but in the goldmine. Make yourself into a goldmineLet him find you in the place of fulfilling destiny. Don’t just sit down waiting and doing nothing.
Purpose is not fulfilled in bed but in the field. So wake up and make yourself useful to yourself and to God while waiting for him.

3. Be teachable and Submissive
You must be a teachable person who is always willing to learn. Remember you are praying to be the woman of his dreams, so you must be willing to listen to him and learn so that you can work together effectively.

Submission is the major role given to the Woman in marriage. Don’t be a headache to him by not showing interest in what God has called him to do. When he receives instructions from God and instructs, be ready to obey and follow. He sees you teachable because he wants you to reach to your ability. It simply means he believes you can do it. What more do you desire than a man who believes in you? Experience has taught me that it is one of the greatest gifts you can ever receive in the world; to be believed in.

A teachable woman is a rich-able woman. Become a well of knowledge. The digging might take time but the deeper the well, the neater and better the water found in the well. Be patient and be a good listener.

4. Believe in him and in his dreams
“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams” – Eleanor Roosevelt

It is one thing to believe in someone and another to believe in that person’s dreams.
You cannot be of help to your man if you don’t believe in him or in his dreams. You should not be a source of discouragement to him. Even when the world is up against him; be that one woman standing by him. No man can ever forget a woman that stands/stood by him when the world was all against him. He might not be there yet, but always tell him and assure him that he can get there. Never lose faith in him. It is often said that “beside every successful man, there is a woman.” You must desire to be that woman beside your man.
Be that beam that illuminates his dream(s)

5. Update and Upgrade
You must have this understanding that what makes information relevant is the fact that it relates to the situation it is been applied. You cannot be useful or relevant to his dreams if your opinions don’t relate to his dreams and purpose. It is therefore expedient that you update and upgrade yourself with time. To update simply means to add to existing information. It is modification of something to a more recent, up-to-date version. On the other hand, to upgrade means to replace an existing object with something better.

Make sure you are adding knowledge to yourself from time to time. Even if you are not knowledgeable in the aspect of his dreams, seek and become knowledgeable so you can be useful to him. On the other hand, don’t just add knowledge but see yourself transform to a better person from who you were before you met him.
Add value and keep adding value. You cannot be priced above your worth

6. Always pray for him
“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure” – Paulo Coelho

There is nothing as blessed than for a man to have a praying woman by his side. A man with such woman by his side can accomplish anything when she is on her knees seeking the face of the Father on his behalf. Be a praying partner. Be busy interceding on his behalf because there is nothing better you can offer a man of purpose than to agree with him in prayers. Every praying wife is a GIFT from God. Be a gift to your man. Be that woman he will always look up to God and appreciate Him for sending her into his life.

7. Be a team player
“Can two walk together, except they be agreed.”
Relationship/marriage is all about team work. God decided to make the woman for the man because He knew that the man needs or will need help at one point in time.
No man is an island. Every successful relationship/marriage is a product of team work
The idea of “Me, Myself and I” should be knocked off from the onset. You are going into that man’s life to help him fulfill God’s purpose and assignment for his life. So be a team player. Don’t be found wanting at any point in time. Be supportive, contributive, attentive and helpful. You are in his life to make him a better him. Without that, you don’t exist in his life

8. Discover you
The truth is that you cannot give what you don’t have.
Have you even discovered what you have? Have you taken time to discover your worth?
It is said that “iron sharpeneth iron.” Are you an iron or a wood? Understand that a wood cannot sharpen an iron. It is either the iron becomes blunt or the wood is destroyed in the process of trying to sharpen the iron. You become useful to your man when you have discovered yourself. Most relationships/marriages suffer today because most women have not discovered who they are. They try to imitate other women and friends thereby causing problems in their relationship or marriage.

No man wants to go the market to buy a fake product or an imitation. They always want the real deal. You must come to an understanding that fake products don’t last. If you imitate friend ‘A’ today, who will you be tomorrow? Be who you really are and let him love you for you. Therefore discover who you really are before meeting him and always be yourself.
The only person you are permitted to be apart from you is being a better and improved you.
God worked on Eve before bringing her to Adam; so let God work on you before meeting your Adam. Don’t be faster than God.

If he is just attracted to your looks, what happens if the looks diminish tomorrow? Will he still love you like he used to? A man that desires the woman of his dreams will focus more on your works rather than looks because your works is what proofs to him that you fit into his dreams (God given assignment) rather than your looks. Looks are just an added advantage.

Did this post bless you? Share it with someone around you. Wanna say something? Your comments are welcome.

P.S: Next week, on MAN TO WOMAN, we will be having a different guest blogger and he will be sharing on something entirely different. Keep your fingers crossed.

Paul E. Aliyu is a young man who is passionate about God and the things of God. He is a missionary who has been in the mission field in Tanzania and is always willing to yield to the leading of the Holy Spirit. He is passionate about inspiring progress and bringing out the best in youths. What's more, he's single!

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