Love alone is not enough; you need wisdom to sustain and maintain every relationship.
TGIF!!!
It’s another Friday and even though I may not be going to some fun place this
weekend, just knowing that the weekend is here always creates this feel-good
feeling. Aha! I know you’re soooo in love with him and you feel like nothing
can come between both of you because of the love you feel. You feel like your love
can surmount any obstacles that could ever come your way. All you need is him
and all he needs is you… But in reality,
there are four people in your man’s life who you need to get on your side if
your relationship or marriage must go smoothly without unnecessary strain here
and there. And these people are:
His Mum
Should I
shout this or scream this for you to understand? His mum is the number one
female in his life and what she says weighs tonnes in the ears of your man. She
gave birth to him and nurtured him till this point. She is one strong ally you
need for your relationship to last. Why? When she’s on your side, she’ll see to
it that he doesn’t bring any other woman home and she’ll rally round the other
family members to support you. She’ll encourage him to treat you right and even
marry you, emphasizing how much of an angel you are. And when you quarrel, she’ll
encourage and prod him to reconcile with you. Also, she knows things about him
that you may not presently know and she could give you more tips on how to
handle him.
His Favorite Female Sibling(s)
After his
mum, another strong ally you need on your side is his favorite female sibling
e.g his sister or cousin. I’m talking about that sibling he loves so much whose
words, opinion and counsel he values. Why? He’s most definitely going to ask
them what they think or feel about you and if they’re on your side, they help
reinforce his feelings for you by letting him know how blessed he is to have
you. If they’re not on your side, all they’ll point out when he asks them what
they think of you are your flaws and all the reasons why you’re not good enough
for him.
His Best Buddy
I’m sure
he has a lot of buddies as you’ve come to know, but if you know him well enough,
you’ll know that there’s one out of them who he considers to be his best
buddie. I’m talking about that one friend whose counsel and opinion he values
and to whom he runs when he’s got a few issues and needs help. You need to have
a cordial relationship with this buddy of his. Why? When he’s on your side, you’re
no longer just his friend’s girl/wife but “our girl/wife” so when they’re out,
he’ll defend your cause before eager, seductive, man-hunting females and gladly
let them know he’s taken or married.
His Pastor or Mentor
His
pastor or mentor plays a huge role in his life too especially with regards to
his future pursuit. Your man most likely values his pastor/mentor’s counsel and
though this does not determine his love for you, it will affect any future
steps he may intend to make with you (especially with regards to marriage).
The Ball is Now in Your Court
Yes dear,
the ball is now in your court. Proverbs 13:15 says “Good understanding wins
favour…” Nothing just happens; favour doesn’t just come, how you behave towards
these people also affects if they will treat you with favour or not. You need
to consciously and prayerfully seek their favour if your relationship with him
must last and experience minimal troubles. “Who cares? I don’t need them
anyways. We love each other and that’s all that matters”, goes the thought in
your heart. Girl, that’s a very naïve thinking and that can only be possible if
he doesn’t have this four classes of people in his life or if he has no regard
for them. These people are the key players in your man’s life and just like
pulling off any deal requires the support of key players, you require them to
be on your side. Ask any mature married female and she’ll give you a better
picture of what I mean. The good news is, with God on your side, prayers and
wisdom plus good behavior, it’s a win-win for you all the way. You know why you
need God? Because “When a man’s ways please the Lord, he causes even his
enemies (those who dislike him) to be at peace with him” (proverbs 16:7).
Addios bebes!
P:S: If you’re a guy reading this, the people
in your girl’s life you need on your side are her parents, her siblings, the people
whose opinion and counsel she values, and most especially, her pastor/mentor. Have
a fulfilling weekend.
Are you
at a crossroad? Do you need advice or counsel on lady issues, relationship
matters and life in general? E-mail me
on graceyokoye@yahoo.com and I’ll
be glad to help.
