Shout out to
all the wonderful people reading this blog
Sometimes in life, even the smartest people
make not so smart moves. Reasons include ignorance, feelings and emotions, adventure,
trial and error, feeling like your case is gonna be different and all. And even
though we don’t want to admit it, we’ve all made dumb moves at different points
in our lives (me too) and done things we’re not so proud of. However, there are
some dumb moves that are common to us ladies. Why are they common? Because a
lot have ladies have made these moves in the past and a lot of them still keep
making these same moves presently.
Now I’m not here to judge anyone or call
anyone dumb. Just wanna show you a few of the dumbest moves we ladies make with
the hope that the vicious cycle of these heart breaking moves comes to an end
(so help me God). In no particular order, let’s check out these dumbest moves.
#1 Dumbest Move – Giving Sex to
Get Love or Keep Him
Yea,
right. Ladies have done this and keep doing this. Some ladies try to use sex to
get a guy-and it actually gets some
of them. The problem is, it usually gets
you the wrong kind of guy: the sex maniac, the serial cheat, the chronic
bachelor with no intentions of settling down or Mr. Booty Call. Some ladies
give sex to “keep” the guy. Usually, it’s because he has been saying things
like “We’re going to get married anyways, why hold back?”, “If you love me,
show me that you love me”, “Honey, do you want me to go after other ladies out
there? Why are you my girlfriend?”, “Just one time, pleeeeease. It will bring
us closer” and so many other pick up lines.
Other ladies give sex thinking it will
make the guy love them more and stay faithful to them. But unfortunately, sex
doesn’t make a guy love you, love you more, stick with you or stay faithful to
you. Those things are a product of personal choice (the guy’s personal choice).
The media and pop culture has taught us otherwise so we keep making these dumb
moves.
#2 Dumbest Move – Playing House
Playing
house means playing “husband and wife” by moving into his house. At first,
things seem rosy and great until the “see-finish syndrome” sets in. You know
that point he begins to take you for granted and doesn’t appreciate you
anymore. That point where you begin to demand more commitment and he keeps
putting it off. That point where he wonders to himself how you didn’t have high
standards for choosing to move in with him; that point where the fights
increase daily and he doesn’t care if you move out of his house because he’s
tired of you anyways. Ladies still keep making this dumb move. Except you don’t
intend to do anything serious with him, moving into his house is a dumb move
that won’t make him marry you.
#3 Dumbest Move – Changing
Yourself in Order to Get or Keep Him
He told
you he likes a girl that does this or does that; he wants to get married to a
girl that acts like this or that. So you start “remixing” yourself to become
his ideal woman, the girl of his dreams. Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing
wrong with upgrading yourself and continuous self-improvement. But losing your
identity and changing to become someone else will not profit you. In the end,
you lose your uniqueness becoming someone else. What happens when the relationship
eventually ends and you’ve acquired habits or should I say vices that cause
trouble for you in subsequent relationships???
#4 Dumbest Move – Asking Guys
Out
Before
you crucify me, hear me out. In our age and time, it’s not uncommon for girls
to ask guys out. Why? Because they’ve got the boldness and they can. You may be thinking “what’s wrong with that” but I dare
say everything is wrong with it. Not every guy is mature enough to handle that
(some guys turn the fact that you asked them out into public gist). Guys also
like to choose for themselves-not the other way round. If you’re so eager to
get a guy to notice you or date your, there are other subtle ways to drop a
hint that shows you like him or you’re open to a relationship which will save
you the flipside of asking him out. What is the flip side? That moment when he
feels he’s seen a girl that he wants and decides to move on telling you “after
all, I didn’t ask you out…”
#5 Dumbest Move – Missionary
Dating
Missionary
dating means dating someone whose character you’re not presently comfortable with
the hopes of “changing” him. We’re so guilty of this. Yes, no one is perfect
and it is possible to influence another person to change, but trying to change another
person will only lead you to frustration. If you don’t like him the way he is,
why are you with him? I hear ladies say things like “I’ll change him”, “I’ll
make him do …”. So they think they can nag, cajole or threaten the guy to change.
No man likes to be nagged, to feel controlled or to feel like you’re trying to
change him. Actually, no one does. Smart guys just go with the flow pretending
to change just to get you to fall even deeper and later show you their true colour.
Missionary dating never changes anyone, except God decides to use you to
influence a change in his life but that is only possible if the guy himself is
willing to change because we all have a free will. Save yourself the heart
break, girl.
If you’re
presently making such dumb moves I’m here to tell you this: all you’re gonna
get is frustration. Make a detour; many have failed and are still failing for
applying these moves. Trade the dumb moves for smarter moves. Do the opposite. Don’t
be deceived: a guy will stay with you and be faithful to you if he chooses, not
because he’s had sex with you. Moving into his house or changing yourself won’t
help either. Having a penchant for asking guys out or missionary dating will
only get you hurt many times over.
P.S. These are the 5 dumbest moves I think
ladies make. Can you think of more?
Keep your eyes glued to our twitter handle @sister2sisterni and our facebook page: Sister 2 Sister Nigeria for more interesting
updates this month. We’ve got a lot of interesting stuff coming up this month.
ALL God has fore-ordained her to be and spreading the gospel to the ends of the earth. 
